Seems like lately all Zadi and I have been doing is bitching about things. We bitch about the show, we bitch about business, we bitch about people on the street, you name it. Part of that is stress, part of that is burnout, and part of it is misplaced indignation about things that are not really important.
Tonight we went for a late night jog to clear our heads and get a little exercise. On the cooldown walk back, we started talking and, as usual, bitching about things. Then then strangest thing happened.
A van pulled up next to us and an elderly woman lowered her window. She asked if we could help her by picking up her husband, who had fallen out of his seat inside the van. Zadi and I looked at each other and considered the situation. There was no way we were going near that van without her opening the doors and turning on the lights.
When she slid open the van's side door, there was a little old man crumpled up on the floor. He had fallen off of his motorized chair. It was obviously not a threatening situation, so I stepped inside to see what I could do.
I'm 6'3", about 200 lbs, and this elderly fellow was probably half my size. After considering the best way to lift him without hurting him, I picked him up off the floor and put him back into his seat. He was was clearly humiliated by the situation. Imagine having to ask a perfect stranger, sweaty from jogging, 11:30 at night, to lift him up like a child and help him sit back down in his chair. I got him settled in, told him no thanks were necessary, and they drove off to destinations unknown.
I believe life is really about noticing the small things. There we were, a young couple with everything in the world going for us, and what were we doing? We were complaining, as usual. Well, that was it. If you believe in signs, there was none clearer that this one. Shut our stupid mouths. Our problems are nothing, they are meaningless. Almost anyone would trade positions with us. We felt like fools.
There will always be reasons to bitch about things. Someone not treating you right? Sucks. Bad luck? Man, I feel for you. But you know what? That's about as far as it should go. Because that stuff just circles right back to you and pollutes your thinking.
Tonight really helped me locate my focus. When we got back home a situation we'd been dealing with suddenly came into very clear focus. It is amazing how clear your mind can become when you simply decide to turn off the unnecessary noise.
1. When something happens, even something important, writing a blog post is really, really far from my mind.
2. Ultimately, I'm a very private person. I enjoy opening up to a close-knit group of friends, but beyond that it takes a while for me to trust people. Most people are surprised when I say this, but it's true.
3. I love the idea of an online repository of someone's person and professional history, but I'm scared by it. For example, tons of people with whom I have close business relationships are now on Twitter. No way I can feel comfortable expressing my honest thoughts knowing that they could be misinterpreted. I post twitters very rarely these days.
4. The things that have gone on with Micki Krimmel and Kathy Sierra are alarming to me. I work with my wife, who is a well-known Internet personality. Any more sharing than is absolutely necessary makes me nervous.
5. I'm mean. Yup, I said it. I can be very direct (as Zadi constantly reminds me) and my natural tendency is toward impatience. A lot of the time I might say things that are too blunt, and it's way too much work to censor myself. So it's easier to just shut the hell up. If I don't like you, you probably know it, and it's probably for a good reason.
